Columbia Brew Bus

While on vacation in Columbia, SC visiting family and friends we were invited to partake in a little brewery touring via the Columbia Brew Bus. This fun idea was started by some Columbia area bros who like to drink and be driven around - I think most of us can related to this. If you happen to hop on this bus you'll get a chance to meet them and if you like similar to people to me then I think you'll find them just dandy.

All tours for the Columbia Brew Bus can be booked on their website (hyperlink above) and it appears they have several options. We just did the standard brewery tour which came to an exact $45 per person. This included three stops (typically 4 but something happened and I didn't pay one shit of attention) and an ass ton of beer. The bus itself was very clean and a professional, sober driver was behind the wheel. One of the cool things is you can bring light snacks and drinks with you and store in one of their coolers. You can also buy beer on the tour and store in said coolers. Two not cool things (not necessarily their fault) is you cannot drink on the bus and you have to wear closed toed shoes - for the womens I know that is frustrating but I don't care because some of y'all have gangly ass feet.

The bus picked my crew up at a central location downtown and we boarded with some Koreans (we assume South) and two older couples. A nice thing about the group mixing is it's great people watching and we spent a solid amount of the night trying to figure out the relationship-Rubik's Cube that was each older couple so that was fun.

We then set off for location #1 (Hunter Gatherer), got the downlow of the night and how things would progress from Bro 1 who was sort of the PACK LEEEADER but Bros 2 and 3 would soon reveal themselves. It was about a 15 minute ride to the first stop which was great for question asking and shitty jokes.

I'm going to review each brewery independently so I'll just review how CBB did in regards to the stops themselves. Stop 1 was by far the best. We had our own area which allowed us to continue isolating ourselves (I hate forced mingling) along with slowly getting into the drinking a lot of beer mood. We had ample time to order food and discuss abortion which is always nice. Bro 1 kept everyone's glasses full and did an excellent job of explaining what each beer was. We were able to spend some time talking to Bros 2 and 3 to learn how they started the business and their back stories. Contrary to my hatred for forced mingling I did enjoy the fact the owners of this adventure met everyone and interacted like errbody else.

Stop 2 (River Rat) was very similar in terms of quality but we were in a common tap room so we were among...STANDARD PATRONS. It was fine because the location was huge and had a large variety of beers to sample. We were taken on a tour of the facility and told a little more about how to brew beer - meh. Tours always feel weird for me because I don't really care how ya get me drunk I just wanna get drunk, mang. This is a big thing for a lot of people so don't let my fuddy-duddyness getcha down. It was at this point in the night where I realized I cannot drink a lot of heavy, good beer. I am a liquor and wine man so I admit defeat, beer.

Stop 3 (Conquest) was not good. The tap room was very small with not much going on and it seemed like a weird place to end the tour. I would definitely think somewhere a little more booming or party-esque for a Friday night would be the way to go. I was yawning a few minutes into it but that could have been the 120 degree room - who knows?

We boarded the bus to head back to the pickup point and there was some trivia and jokes. The most important thing we learned on the way home was they are soon to be setting up distillery and winery tours which THAT is what I'm all about - so I'm hoping I get a chance to revisit this situation in the future.

Overall I think $45 for this event was pretty solid - you can definitely drink $45 in beer pretty easily. Some things I think that would make it better is ending at a more vibrant location, having some activities at the breweries (impromptu cornhole / flip cup anyone?) or a beer-food option when signing up. I'm pretty pumped to see where these bros take this business and our group had a really fun time - if you guys are reading this I think you've got an awesome thing going on.

Oh. And there is a pole in the bus so that seems like it could be fun...